The Highway Forums General Discussion Open Forum Ack, help!

As most of you know I have been struggling with sin lately. I have tried to resist, but to no avail. I have been in prayer over this for some time now and have decided to come to you all for help. I know that you are all loving and wonderful Christians, and willing to help a fellow brother in Christ. I'm looking for someone to be my accountability partner. I'm looking for someone who is within ten years of my age (15), is strongly grounded in the Word of God, and willing to do whatever it takes to help me (a strong stomach wouldn't go amiss either). Thank you, and God bless you all.

I will continue to pray for you, Nathan, especially that the Lord would provide you with an accountability partner. As a mom of three boys, I would encourage you to find someone here with whom you feel comfortable and can talk to, but don't neglect finding someone where you live with whom you can make yourself accountable, too. Here at the Highway you can get godly advice and scriptural counsel, but that can never take the place of a face to face relationship with someone close at hand. It is very important that whoever is counseling you is able to 1) be available to you in times of temptation and 2) be able to truly keep you accountable by "watching" your life as a shepherd watches over his sheep. One more thing that I would suggest, again as a mom; don't limit yourself to men who are only a certain age. Wisdom comes with age and God has a way of building men in wisdom and grace through trials and many life experiences.

First, you are showing much humility and courage by posting this-a step in the right direction. <br><br>Second, if I may make a suggestion: I would have an accountability partner that I could actually meet with vs. one I could merely communicate with on-line. Additionally, I do not know what sin(s) you are struggling with, but if I may suggest you ask for/purchase some books by Jay Adams. I am fairly sure your sin problem is covered in one or more of his texts.<br><br>Third, also, sit down and speak to this with your pastor. He may have someone else at your church who will fit the bill for your accountability partner.<br><br>We will of course keep you in prayer.

I'd actually prefer that it was someone I couldn't see, because my sin is so shameful even to myself, I can't bear to look someone in the face as I recount it. Also, I like their reactions to be wholly their own (I don't like to see the revulsion on their faces). <br><br>I have spoken to my pastor(s) about it, but most of the people in the church(es) that I attend are old and married and thus haven't experienced this sort of temptation in a long, long time. <br><br><br>Thank you all for praying for me.

You have been given good counsel. Another possibility to look into is a small men's group at church that can serve as an accountability group. While there are advantages in a one-to-one relationship, a group can help share the load. Particularly when there is a need someone in the group familiar with your needs would be available.<br>

<blockquote><font size=1>In reply to:</font><hr>[color:"blue"]I'd actually prefer that it was someone I couldn't see, because my sin is so shameful even to myself, I can't bear to look someone in the face as I recount it.</font><hr></blockquote><p>I can certainly empathize with what you are saying here, Nathan. But it is not sound reasoning, in that it smacks of pride. I can assure you that your sin(s) are not unique to you. In fact, I would be so bold as to say that whatever it is, there are countless other young men who have been guilty of what you are struggling with. This God Himself has said as well, "There hath no temptation taken you but such as is <span style="background-color:yellow;">common to man</span>:" (1Cor 10:13). And although it may be shameful to even speak of, there are those who are always in remembrance of their deliverance and the pit which they once wallowed in. But the fact that they have been delivered make them all the more able to offer the help you seek. For they will be able to be bold to deal with this matter, but in a spirit of brokenness knowing that it is by grace that we all live by faith.<blockquote><font size=1>In reply to:</font><hr>[color:"blue"]but most of the people in the church(es) that I attend are old and married and thus haven't experienced this sort of temptation in a long, long time.</font><hr></blockquote><p>Gee, another faulty "excuse"?!! [img]http://www.the-highway.com/w3timages/icons/sad.gif" alt="sad" title="sad[/img] Tell me, if you were trying to stop smoking, just as an example, would you find more encouragement from someone who hadn't had a cigarette in 3 days or from someone who hasn't smoked in 20 or 30 years? [img]http://www.the-highway.com/w3timages/icons/wink.gif" alt="wink" title="wink[/img] Personally, I would much prefer to be under the guidance and accountability of someone who is a "winner" rather than a "might be" or a "wannabe". Think about that.<br><br>In His Grace,

Pilgrim is absolutely correct!<br><br>I agree with the others that you should have an accountability partner near you- an accountability partner on the Internet would not be as effective. You can delete emails easier than hanging up on somebody, if you know what I mean. Don't let all these excuses keep in the way of this. Seek out a man you know who is a faithful Christian. By the way, where did you come up with the "within 10 years of my age"? Why couldn't an older person help you with this?

<blockquote><font size=1>In reply to:</font><hr>[color:"blue"]Why couldn't an older person help you with this?</font><hr></blockquote><p>Goodness, Marie....... didn't you know that males over the age of 25 are "over the hill"? [img]http://www.the-highway.com/w3timages/icons/gramps.gif" alt="gramps" title="gramps[/img] All they do throughout the entire is play Canasta or Parcheesi and think about getting up off the couch to get a refill of cheese balls? <br><br>Why, I'm so old and my memory so bad, I dare not go out of the house without a picture ID, just in case someone should ask me who I am. <br><br><center></center><br><br>Still breathin' steady!!

I'll pray for you Nathan.<br><br>Ron

Whats wrong with 5 year olds ?<br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br>Only jesting <br><br>howard

Nathan you've had some good advice here and if you are able, let us know publically or PM/E-mail those you feel comfortable with about your particular anxieties.<br><br>Meanwhile : "Stand in awe , and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Se-lah. " Psalm 4:4 kjv.<br><br>howard<br>

<blockquote><font size=1>In reply to:</font><hr>[color:"blue"]But it is not sound reasoning, in that it smacks of pride. </font><hr></blockquote><p><br><br>Smacks of pride?! I don't get it! Pilgrim, if you'd had your hands and feet cut off at the wrists and ankles respectively, had had the left side of your nose taken off, both ears cut off, and your eyes gouged out, would you relish the screams of horror of small children as they see you? Would you enjoy hearing women scream at the very mention of your name? Would you parade it around? Or would you rather avoid it? Would you rather not see people? My apologies for being harsh like this, but it does get the point across I hope.

<blockquote><font size=1>In reply to:</font><hr>[color:"blue"]Smacks of pride?! I don't get it! Pilgrim, if you'd had your hands and feet cut off at the wrists and ankles respectively, had had the left side of your nose taken off, both ears cut off, and your eyes gouged out, would you relish the screams of horror of small children as they see you? Would you enjoy hearing women scream at the very mention of your name? Would you parade it around? Or would you rather avoid it? Would you rather not see people? My apologies for being harsh like this, but it does get the point across I hope. </font><hr></blockquote><p> Did Christ look at you when you were in your lost deplorable condition--dirty filthy rags (look this up you may find it very descriptive)? Then so should His Church! Of course, I am not saying to flaunt your sin, that is sin in and of itself, but if you do not have a Church mature enough to assist people in their struggles, then one must ask if this is truly a Church that you should be attending. Even if you cannot leave your present Church for various reasons, in your hometown there has to be one person you can find to be accountable to. Begin praying for God to bring you this person.<br><br><blockquote>Matthew 4:24 And his fame went throughout all Syria: and they brought unto him all sick people that were taken with divers diseases and torments, and those which were possessed with devils, and those which were lunatick, and those that had the palsy; and he healed them.<br><br>Matthew 15:30 And great multitudes came unto him, having with them those that were lame, blind, dumb, maimed, and many others, and cast them down at Jesus' feet; and he healed them: </blockquote> Jesus even healed lepers! Have you ever seen someone with leprosy? Though your sins be as scarlet...

I was thinking the same thing when I first read this thread, Howard!

Amen, Joe.<br><br>Paul himself said he was wretched and the chief of all sinners.<br><br>Jesus saves totally depraved sinners. Can't get any worse than totally depraved.<br><br>We are to bear one another's burdens. We all have like sheep gone astray, we all were condemned before God at some point.