Neicey, your name is interesting. What does it mean?

You asked, “I don't understand, at what time would I have been neutral?
And do you mean also without GOD’s Grace in this position?”

No, I do not mean without God’s grace. By His grace we’re saved through faith. At times humans under the special conviction of God can form a bias from a position of neutrality (equipoise). It is temporary neutrality. Before and after this phase they are free agents, but they do not have true free will except during this phase. Adam and Satan are examples of people who temporarily had true free will. Totally depraved humans are free agents – they do what they want to do, sin. They cannot surrender to Christ in repentance and faith until their total depravity is counteracted. Five-point Calvinists believe that God regenerates them to counteract their depravity so that they can surrender in repentance and faith. Most five-point Calvinists believe that their repentance/faith is simultaneous with their regeneration, but the logical order places regeneration before repentance/faith. Some five-point Calvinists hold to an extended (elongated) view where regeneration is viewed as more of a process than an event. In the elongated view there may be a time gap between initial regeneration (illumination) and repentance/faith. Modified Calvinists (like me) and Arminians believe that regeneration (the actual imparting of spiritual life) follows repentance/faith. I believe that there is a conversion process in which God takes the initiative. Rather than calling God’s initiative “initial regeneration” like those holding the elongated view, I prefer to call it “special conviction” to distinguish it from common grace and the regeneration event where life is imparted.