In reply to:

rather than believe that God has already taken care of everything for His elect but not knowing for sure if I could even be one of them.

You see to believe that God has already taken care of everything for His elect involves a something called Faith. Your friend who said that no one could know for sure whether they were elect or not wasn't showing much faith at the moment. You say "how can you know that you are elect and that God has secured you?" I say "by faith."

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I see why you think I believe in a "works righteousness." The problem lies in what you consider works. Works are good deeds, acts of righteousness, or keeping of the law. The same term does not apply to humility, open-heartedness, love

That is odd, I thought that the two greatest commandment on which all the law and the prophets hung on dealt with love. The first is to love God with all your heart, and the next is to love your neighbor as yourself. If you tell me that these are not law, then I will say that Christ calls them the greatest commandments. If you tell me that you can even come close to keeping these every second of everyday, then I will say that you have decieved yourself.

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So the will is not what saves us, though its compliance with God's will is essential for a man to be saved.

This is a contradiction of statements. For you, man's will is what salvation hinges on. God has done all he can, but now it is up to man to help himself. So now the will is what saves man. Christ blood doesn't save anyone, because Christ died for everyone and that didn't help. God's love didn't save anyone because God loves everybody and that didn't help. The Holy Spirit drawing people got everyone up to par, but really didn't secure anything so now it is up to man. So now it is man's will that makes salvation possible.

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Forgive me for sounding so forward, but I must disagree on that point. I have seen no scriptures in the Bible that support the idea that all believers, without exception, will endure to the end.

1John 2:19
"They went out from us, but they were not really of us; for if they had been of us, they would have remained with us; but they went out, so that it would be shown that they all are not of us."

They fall away to show, as evidence, that they are really not Christians in the first place.

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harden their own hearts (Hebrews 3:7-9), and choose to abide in unbelief (Romans 11:20 -- note that they were broken off because of their unbelief,

I would also harden my heart, I would also abide in unbelief forever if I were still a lost sinner dead in my sins. But while I was dead in my sins, God by grace through faith, which was a gift, made me alive in Christ(Eph 2:1-8).

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For instance, John chapter 6 which you cited: The assumption that you have that I do not is that just because it is God's will, it must then happen.

John 6:44"No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him; and I will raise him up on the last day."

I sure hope that you believe God will raise up beleivers on the last day, or maybe you assume that just because God wills to raise up believers on the last day dosen't mean it must happen.

John 6:40 "For this is the will of My Father, that everyoe who beholds the Son and believes in Him will have eternal life..."

The Father wills that everyone who beholds the Son and believes in Him will have eternal life, but I guess maybe that wont' happen either. Maybe some who behold the Son and believe will not have eternal life.