Janean,

Your question(s) aren't unique and have been asked by countless others. Here are a few resources which you might find helpful to answer them:

Objections to the Doctrine of Predestination Answered, by Loraine Boettner.

Chosen but Free?, by James Harrison.

The Call that Brings a Response, by Paul Helm.

In His Grace,

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simul iustus et peccator

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