The Highway Forums General Discussion Open Forum Children's Church

Here is an issue that up until fairly recently was never an issue that I was concerned about.
The Church I attend has all ages attending the same worship service together. Sometimes this can cause a few minor problems when young children cry or make a fuss. However, two years in a row now when some friends from out of town visited, that issue was brought to my attention and I am not sure what to think about it.
My friend and his wife adopted a 2 ½ year old girl a few years back. This young girl although quite intelligent was born with fetal alcohol syndrome. When she is not mentally stimulated she can act up and cause a lot of stress to her parents and those around her. My friend told me that at the Church they attend, this isn’t a problem because they have children’s Church during worship services. They told me that the people who lead Children’s Church make sure that this time isn’t just play time, but worship and teaching geared towards young children.
When my friend brought this up to me, he tried to make sure that he was not criticizing our Church for not having Children’s Church. However, he made it clear that he believed that given the fact that we have quite a few young children attending, he thought we should have Children’s Church, at least until the children are a little older.
Personally speaking I am not even sure I should bring this matter up with the elders. But I think I can understand where my friend is coming from.
Any thought?

Tom

I much rather have children's church where after the offering the children (ages 3,4-6,7) go to a separate room to do a study, than those churches who have a time during the worship service where the kids come up to hear a quick lesson from the pastor. It mostly teaches the children how to be entertainers, and it takes away from the seriousness of the worship service.

I know some have good arguments against children's church, but it can be a good vehicle. I neither advocate for or against it.

John

Thanks for your take on the issue. After thinking about the issue a little more, I would agree with you that the worship time should be spent with the rest of the congregation.
I found a helpful article written by Tom Ascol (a Reformed Baptist) that I thought I would post here.
http://www.ligonier.org/learn/articles/one-family-under-god/

As I think of my experience with Children's Church through out the years, especially when my children were young. Every single Church up until now had Children's Church.
Something that stood out to me, is the fact the people in charge of teaching the children never got a chance to worship and listen the sermons with the rest of the congregation.
I think this is a real shame, regardless of whether that person was an elder or not.

Tom

I'm agin "Children's Church". Even the name I find objectionable, for the Church of the LORD Jesus Christ is for [professing] believers and their children. Yes, I realize most Baptists would immediately raise an objection to this idea that "families" are an indissoluble unit, etc. I do not believe that Scripture warrants dividing families into age groups when it comes to corporate worship. If nothing else, looking at it from a practical standpoint... what better place to teach children about the true worship of God than in the assembly of the saints? What better place for parents to instruct, guide and discipline their children than in the formal worship of the God before whom they will have to give an account?

Children's 'church' invariably gives these impressionable minds the idea that God is "fun" and is not to be taken seriously. In the assembly of the saints it is the preaching elder's responsibility to preach the Word to ALL; to their understanding and them make appropriate application of that Word to ALL, whether elderly or very young.

I say, therefore, expose your children to the true, biblically mandated and regulated worship of God at your earliest convenience so that the Spirit of God might call them to repentance and faith and they will be taught properly by the Church as God has ordained for His saints and their children.

That's my

In my previous church in East Asia, we did not have a nursery or "cry room" for children because not only the little ones of Israel attended public reading of the law; as well, we could not find any scriptural warrant for separating the children, and we all agreed that the regulative principle applied.
I believe the Holy Spirit blesses our attempts to teach our covenant children to learn to be still during the worship service. As soon as our son was old enough to respond to discipline, we prayerfully & proverbially taught him to not throw tantrums at that time. It worked.

I agree with you goldenoldie. Children need to learn by example and be with their parents in a worship service.

Pilgrim
Where do you get the idea that Baptists would raise that objection?
In fact although this issue is fairly new to me and I am still studying the issue; seeing this is the first Reformed Baptist Church I have ever been to. We never the less have everybody in the same worship service.
I have not asked why this is, but I suspect that my pastor and the elders would agree with you on this one.

Tom

That is answered in my first sentence above: "...for the Church of the LORD Jesus Christ is for [professing] believers and their children." This is historic Reformed covenant theology which, to be safe, I'd venture to say that 99.9% Baptists reject. That's why they are Baptists, right? No doubt, there are Baptists who would believe that children should not be removed from the formal corporate worship service of God, but for other reasons than the children are part of the Church. My contention is that children BELONG there but not simply for some practical or pragmatic reason.

Yes, yes... it's a paedo vs. credo difference.

But knowing that Baptists reject the historic Reformed and confessional doctrine of paedobaptism, it would be fruitless to labor the point. Thus, using other valid arguments which I also included in my reasons for rejecting "children's church", are often more convincing, unfortunately, but at least they sometimes are enough to make people think further about this issue.

Pilgrim

Though I am Credo, when I read you the first time when you said: "...for the Church of the LORD Jesus Christ is for [professing] believers and their children." the issue of Paedo vs. Credo didn't even cross my mind. But, I understand your point now.
I took you to mean that a professing believer, who takes their parenting responsibilities seriously, will worship with their children. Yet, thinking about your wording now I was mistaken.

Tom

But Tom, that is exactly correct. And that's why I wrote that despite Credos summarily dismissing paedobaptism and the covenant theology it is founded upon, those who believe children should be with their parents in the public corporate worship of God will find other less 'theological' reasons to support their view. And that's a good thing, for at least they are doing the right thing, IMO.

Agreed, I think we can agree on that.

As I said in my opening post, I understand where my friend is coming from. I think he mistakenly believes that providing Children's Church for young children such as his daughter (who has fetal alcohol syndrome) they are being responsible parents.

As I previously indicated this is a matter that until fairly recently, was not even an issue I really thought about.
It is also an issue that unfortunately is not taught in the majority of Churches. This includes most Churches who teach the doctrines of grace. Is it any wonder why many Christians don`t understand the importance of every member of the family being part of a worship service.
Thinking back to when my own children were young, they had children`s Church and though around that time, I discovered the doctrines of grace. The only issue concerning children`s Church that crossed my mind, was what my children were being taught.
My experience back then with parents, who insisted on keeping their children with them, was in a few cases very negative.
For instance, one three year old escaped his parents and ran to the pastor while he was in the middle of his sermon. My pastor at the time rolled with it and it caused a few laughs, but the parents were clearly embarrassed.
I have to admit that at the time I was probably thinking that these parents were being irresponsible by not letting their children go to Children`s Church. Yet had my understanding been that children should stay to worship with their parents; I might have been a little more sympathetic to those parents.
With my knowledge of the issue back then, I certainly didn`t think I was being irresponsible for sending my children to Children`s Church. Both my wife and I love our children and tried to do what we thought was best for them.

Tom